06 Aug 4 Tips To Support Someone Dealing With Depression

I often talk about living your best life but what is it if you do not take care about your mental health. In fact, it is one of the main aspect of your life that you have to keep in check. In today’s society, most of us try to live the perfect life and envy the lifestyle you may see on social media. You shouldn’t believe what you see on social media.  That being said, the constant thought of trying to achieve a status that someone is portraying can lead to a feeling of sadness and despair which could be signs of clinical depression. No one is safe from it and last year, I was there to support someone that is very close to me that was suffering from depression. For the sake of this article, I will name that person, Jake, just so I could explain myself better. In this article, I want to share with you different tips that can help you support a friend/acquaintance that may be dealing with depression.

If you think that you are personally suffering from depression, do not hesitate to contact a professional, your doctor, a counselor at school or work, therapist, or other mental health specialist.

Be There With Them

When Jake was feeling depressed, it was not easy to be there for him mentally. I am very close to Jake and I am also sensitive to energy. I feed myself from other people energy and it is safe to say that when someone is feeling down, it does impact my energy level as well. However, in this case, I had no choice to stay strong and to be there for him. You have to understand that you have to be safe when you are there for someone. Since we are not expert, we have to understand that our goal is not to cure, nor to ”save” but instead, to be a shoulder to lean on. You have to be there with them and be sure to not always speak your mind out but instead to listen. Being able to listen to them, and to have a relationship where they feel that they can talk without feeling judge is key. Your words are important and you can tell them how important they are for you: show them love, hold hands, truly demonstrate that you are there for them. PUT YOUR PHONE AWAY. When looking back at what happened with Jake, I think the fact that I was there with him made a difference, it helped him gain confidence but also, made him feel that he was not alone. I chose to be there for Jake, and I encourage you to be there for those around you as well

Be A Good Listener

I mentioned above how important it was to be there with them. However, it doesn’t mean anything if you are not able to be a good listener. Here are a few tips that can help you become a good listener:

• Keep your ears open and your mouth shut
• Make eye contact
• Stay Focused
• Avoid Distractions
• Don’t interrupt and don’t interrogate.

When Jake was dealing with depression, I recall his parent being aware of it and ”trying” to listen to him but would often nag and try to ”make sense out of him” like they would say. It doesn’t work like that and you have to be patient. Being a good listener is a strategy that will increase their trust towards you and you want to be able to find a solution with them. However, the best solution is to connect them with a professional help. 

Bring Them Joy, In Small Increments

Depression is characterized by the feeling of sadness, the change in one’s regular habits, irritability, appetite change, fatigue and more. It is also characterized by the feeling of being alone and feeling of helplessness. What if you can focus on trying to hack these feelings. I personally think that one of the main actions I did while being there with Jake was to bring a small dose of happiness time after time. It starts with being proud of them when they were able to sleep, trying to spend time with them and be active. Going for a run, going for a walk, sending a random text just to check up on them. Being there for someone and trying to bring joy can go a long way. At the time, I saw a massive evolution in his mood and attitude. He was getting better.

BE PATIENT

It will take the time it takes for them to feel better so do not rush things.

As I am writing this, I am still having chills because Jake was at one of his lowest levels. I personally don’t think that he had suicidal thoughts but I don’t want to think of it. Be there for your friend and family. If there’s one thing that we keep losing every day, it is time and you don’t want to look back and regret the time that you didn’t spend with your loved one.

My friend Julie is a mental health advocate that is currently looking to have some donation to attend the #MotoSocialCamp. CLICK HERE to support her!

See the video below about Jack.Org the is the only Canadian charity training and empowering young leaders to revolutionize mental health.